Willette Didn’t Mind… by Clark Humphrey
Willette didn’t mind…
by Clark Humphrey
Willette didn’t mind that her name was so obscure, something that had probably never appeared on a novelty toy license plate.
She did mind, however, that iw was so easily made into the buttof jokes by unimaginative bullies.
It was either “Willette the Razor Blade,” or “Willette Won’t It,” or “You Bet She Willette.”
By the fifth grade, she’d heard each of these, by her count, about a million times.
She’d devleoped a “patented” action in response, a simultaneous yawning and rolling the eyes, as if to say that was the most absolute BORING thing anybody could ever say.
But in the seventh grade, new, innovative insult jokes on her name emerged.
And, yes, almost all of them involved the depiction of her as the school slut.
To be a virgin yet be called a slut was the worse. The time without the crime.
By the ninth grade, she’d invented a ‘logo’ to go with her signature. An attempt to “rebrand” herself. A drawing of a little willow.