Kelly Told Lies by Shanna

Kelly Told Lies by Shanna


Kelly liked to tell stories. Everyone in the office told stories, but none were as good as Kelly’s. Did you know she saw that famous celebrity couple on the street last weekend? You know, the couple that claims they aren’t dating. Well, he’s not as tall as he looks on television and she wears a lot of makeup. Of course, that just made Kelly miss her ex-boyfriend. They broke up because he is an astronaut and was leaving on a mission to the space station and he thought it wouldn’t be fair to Kelly to have such a long distance relationship. But she’s dealing with him not being here. Oh, and you heard how the boss took Kelly aside today to tell her how much he liked her pitch and that she was next in line for a promotion. Kelly liked to tell stories but we all knew that none of her stories were true.


“You will not believe what happened over the weekend!” Kelly exclaimed as she stood over my desk.


I cleared my throat and slowly looked up from my computer screen, schooling my features into feigned interest. “What happened?” I asked.


Kelly bounced into my cubicle and sat down across from me. “Well,” she said, “I was walking home from the bar and I decided to take this shortcut through the park since my apartment is right on the other side of it. And it’s not like I was drunk or anything because I wasn’t. I mean, I had like 7 beers at the bar but you know I never get drunk. I just have a good metabolism that way.”


“Of course,” I said, nodding my head. I leaned back in my chair and clasped my hands together in my lap.


“So I’m walking through the park and I can feel someone watching me because you know I have that sixth sense. I can usually tell if someone is watching me. I could feel these eyes staring at me so I decide to hold onto my bag a little tighter. All of a sudden this guy comes out of the bushes and grabs my bag!”

“Oh no!” I said, feigning dismay.

“I know!” Kelly said, her eyes wide. “Luckily I had taken those kickboxing classes so I quickly hit and kicked him. And you know I have a real strong kick. The guy let go of my bag and fell down and I ran. I wasn’t far from my apartment so I just ran home.”

I gripped my hands tighter. I worried that they would reach out to grab Kelly’s shoulders and shake her. I managed to reply. “That’s amazing Kelly. I can’t believe you were able to get away.”

“Me too! Can you imagine what would have happened if I didn’t know how to defend myself? I guess I’m just lucky that way.” Kelly shrugged with a smirk on her face and stood up. “Well I’m off to lunch. I’ll see you later.”


I let go of my hands and watched Kelly walk away. “What will she think up next?” I thought as I shook my head and turned back to my computer.


Kelly liked to tell tales. Did you know she grew up in Zambia in a tribal village? Her parents were missionaries who were killed when their Jeep was trampled and attacked by wild zebras. The tribe was the only family that Kelly knew so she lived with them until she was ten. Plus, that way she didn’t have to abandon her pet warthog. The shaman that she lived with taught her all kinds of witchcraft and made her an honorary priestess. But she ended up moving back to America to live with some family friends, which was a good thing because otherwise she would probably be married now with 5 kids. All the tribal families wanted Kelly to marry their sons because she was just so beautiful, even at 10 years old. Even now she frequently gets stopped on the street by strangers wondering if she is a model or an actress. Producers and agents are always passing her their business cards when she goes out. Kelly liked to tell tales but we all knew they were fake.


“Coffee, I need coffee,” I mumbled to myself. Grabbing my mug, I navigated through the maze of office confusion and made my way to the break room. As I got closer I could hear voices coming from within and I slowed to listen. Was that Kelly talking?


“It’s simply mind-blowing. You have to try it.”


“But isn’t it scary?” I recognized the voice of the newest employee, Tina. Tina had only been working here for a week but was already an avid admirer of Kelly.


“Oh course it’s scary but that’s the whole point,” said Kelly. I frowned. What was Kelly exaggerating about now?


Curious, I peaked my head around the door. Kelly was standing next to the refrigerator, a bottle of juice on the counter along with a bagel. Tina was staring at Kelly in rapt attention.


“But how do you not die?” asked Tina, her eyes wide in adoration.


“Oh it’s easy,” said Kelly. “You stand at the top of the falls, looking over. The falls seems so high, they just seem to go on forever. Then, you climb into the barrel and close the door and push off. You kind of float along for a while and then all of a sudden you’re free falling, down, down, down towards the water. Then, bam!” Kelly slapped her hands together, making Tina jump. “You hit the water and sink. Then the barrel bobs up to the surface and you get out and go back to the top to do it all over again.”


“Wow,” said Tina. “I don’t think I could ever be that brave.”


“You should really try it,” Kelly said, sipping her juice. “I was nine when I went over Victoria Falls in Zambia. I only had an old ripped mattress stuffed with hay to absorb the shock inside the barrel.”


I slowly backed away from the door. I was no longer in need in coffee.


Kelly boasted of many things. Did you know she went to school with that famous actress? You know the one, she just won an Oscar. They’re still friends but it’s really hard for them to meet in public because of the paparazzi. Of course, if Kelly had joined the CIA like the recruitment officer wanted her to, then she would know how to evade the paparazzi, but she didn’t. Then again, it’s hard for Kelly to evade the paparazzi ever since her leg was broken after being attacked by a shark while snorkeling. Kelly boasted of many things but none of them were true.


I was kneeling on the floor, rooting around in a filing cabinet, searching for an old marketing flyer. Spying the one I wanted, I grabbed it, stood up and turned around, only to come face to face with a stranger. He was tall with blond hair, and was holding a yellow flower in his left hand. I could feel my cheeks heating with a blush as I stared at his face.

“Is Kelly here?” he asked.

I stumbled over my answer. “Yeah she’s right there.” I looked around and pointed at Kelly as she walked down the hall towards us with Lori.

Kelly looked up. “Mike!” she cried, as she ran into his arms. Lori and I glanced at one another as the couple embraced.


Kelly turned to look at us, her face beaming in the florescent office lights. “This is Mike,“ she said. “He’s been on the space station for the past 6 months. I thought we were meeting tonight,” she turned to ask him.

I stopped in midstep. “Space station,” I thought. I could have sworn she was lying when she said that.


Mike looked down sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. “We were,” he said, “but after getting back to Earth and being cooped up in that medical lab for the past 4 weeks, I just couldn’t wait to see you.”


‘”Awww,” cried Lori as the couple embraced again.


“Space station,” ran through my mind as I watched Kelly and Mike smile and gush at one another.


“Can you leave early,” asked Mike. Kelly sighed and bit her lip, glancing down the hall towards her office.


“Yes!” cried Lori. “Go, leave. I will cover for you.” She made shooing motions at Mike and Kelly and herded them towards the main entrance. I could hear all three of them laughing and giggling as Mike pulled Kelly through the reception area and onto the elevator. I stood there, dumbfounded, in the same spot I had been standing in for the past 5 minutes. I heard Lori run past me to Kelly’s office and then run back to the elevators with Kelly’s purse and jacket in her hand.


“Space station,” I mumbled. Maybe Kelly didn’t tell lies?




About bbcstudiowrites

This blog is me archiving the BBC Studio Writers Workshop.

Posted on February 19, 2014, in Fiction, Seattle, Short Stories. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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